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How to Rizz Someone Up: Flirting Tips and Tricks from a Relationship Coach

O’Malley’s was hoppin’ on Saturday night. I nursed my G&T, soaking it all in.

Across the room, a handsome stranger locked eyes with an elegant woman sitting alone. He strolled over and leaned against the bar. “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?” he asked with a charming smile. She blushed, then said cleverly, “I do have a name, but you can call me tonight.”

They both laughed, obviously rizzing each other up. Their body language was engaged, and their rapport was natural. Bam! Deep convo – like old pals. I realized I was witnessing two masters of the art of rizz.

What does it mean to “rizz” someone? Rizz is a slang term referring to the skill of seducing or charming a potential love interest, especially using verbal communication.

The word was popularized by Gen Z in 2022 and named Oxford’s word of the year in 2023, embodying “style, charm, and attractiveness.”

I was Rizzing it up! Meme

Rizz stems from the word “charisma” and captures the modern essence of attraction. It emphasizes the art of nonverbal cues like eye contact and the finesse of verbal interactions.

Rizzing someone up means making lasting, positive impressions through social skills, turning everyday encounters into opportunities for a genuine connection.

In this article, I’ll share tips and tricks from my decade as a relationship coach to help you rizz up that special someone. Let’s go upgrade your rizz game right now!

How to Rizz Up a Girl: The Dos and Don’ts of Charming Women

When trying to rizz up a girl, being a gentleman is always a good place to start. Like I say to my clients, “Bad boys may intrigue, but gentlemen captivate. While a rebel excites the girl, a gentleman ensnares the woman.”

Some of the dos include:

  • Smile and maintain eye contact to show you’re happy to see her. Don’t stare creepily, just friendly glances.
  • Use humor wisely to make her laugh, but avoid offensive or vulgar jokes.
  • Give thoughtful, specific compliments on her outfit, hair, talents, etc. Avoid generic lines.
  • Dress sharp and groom yourself well. Women notice the details.
  • Have engaging conversations. Ask open-ended questions about her interests and goals. Show genuine interest.
  • Show sincere interest in what she’s passionate about. Remember important details.
  • Pay attention to body language cues. Use appropriate touching, like a hug or touch on the arm.
  • Surprise her with small gifts or gestures, like her favorite coffee or a personalized playlist.
  • Be respectful of her boundaries. Don’t pressure her into anything.
  • Suggest fun date ideas and create memorable experiences together.
  • Be authentic. Don’t front. Be you.
I don't always rizz, but when I do, I make sure it's legendary Meme

Some don’ts include:

  • Don’t dress sloppy or smell bad. Pay attention to hygiene.
  • Don’t rely on cliches and generic compliments. Be original.
  • Refrain from boring small talk. Have meaningful conversations.
  • Don’t expect her to pay or split the bill. Be gracious.
  • Don’t make inappropriate or vulgar jokes. Keep it classy.
  • Don’t lie, manipulate, or play games. Be sincere. Show interest confidently and ask her out on a date. But be respectful if she declines.

With the right balance of charm, sincerity, and confidence, you can rizz up any girl.

How to Rizz Up a Guy: The Secrets of Charming Men

Ladies, remember that “The loud woman turns heads, the graceful woman ensnares hearts. While brazen behavior may intrigue, subtle seduction captivates.” Keep it loose, and you’ll attract every man (most likely the wrong ones); keep it classy, and you’ll attract high-value men.

Rizzing up a guy requires striking that delicate balance. Here are some tips for charming men with grace:

  • Smile and make eye contact to show you’re interested and engaged. Hold his gaze just long enough to spark curiosity.
  • Initiate conversation and approach first. Guys dig when a girl makes the first move.
  • Tease and flirt. Witty banter. Keep it fun and challenge him a bit.
  • Compliment him sincerely on his looks, skills, or achievements. Stroke his ego.
  • Use subtle touches on his arm or shoulder. Be flirtatious but not overbearing with physical contact.
  • Flirt suggestively with tones, gestures, and even innuendos. Leave something to the imagination.
  • Ask questions and be an engaged listener. Make him feel heard and understood.
  • Share common interests and laugh together. Bond over hobbies or pop culture.
  • Express your authentic self and opinions. No faking. Show the real you.
  • Give him space between dates or texts. Keep an air of mystery.
  • Make him work for it a bit. Don’t be too eager or available. Enjoy the chase.

With the right mix of confidence, fun, and feminine charm, you can rizz up any guy and leave him captivated and wanting more.

Ask for help, and he'll feel needed and valued Meme

How to Rizz Someone Up over Text: The Best Texting and DMing Tips for Rizzing

Rizzing someone up over text messages or DMs poses a unique challenge – you have nothing to rely on but words on a screen and perhaps some emojis. Without the advantages of body language, vocal tones, or real-time reactions, you must captivate solely through the strength of your written banter, intrigue, and charm.

If done right, texting and DMing open opportunities for rizzing and attraction. Here are some tips:

  • Grab ’em with a killer opener. Go with an intriguing question or hot take.
  • Charm ’em with wit, quips, flirty emojis. Have a playful personality.
  • Keep texts concise yet engaging. Avoid long blocks of text.
  • Stay mysterious. Don’t spill all the deets right away.
  • Compliment them sincerely to make them feel good and boost their interest.
  • Ask thoughtful questions and pose playful challenges to stimulate conversation.
  • Flirt suggestively to build sexual tension – but keep it classy.
  • Send amusing memes, gifs, and pictures to make them laugh and smile.
  • Reference previous chats or experiences you’ve shared to strengthen your connection.
  • Use strategic timing between messages. Don’t respond instantly or take too long.
  • End on a high note with a cliffhanger or call to action so they eagerly await your following text.

With the right mix of humor, intrigue, flirtation, and engagement over text, you can rizz up and charm anyone.

How to Rizz Someone Up with Words: What to Say and How to Say It

The words you choose can have a powerful effect when trying to rizz someone up. Here are some effective verbal strategies:

  • Use their name often in conversation. It creates a personal connection.
  • Talk optimistically using positive words. This uplifts their mood.
  • Describe things vividly using colorful, descriptive language. This sparks their imagination.
  • Compliment them sincerely on their qualities and traits. This makes them feel appreciated.
  • Tell lighthearted jokes and humorous anecdotes. This makes them feel at ease.
  • Share interesting stories and experiences. This creates a bond.
  • Ask thoughtful questions and respond attentively. This shows you’re engaged.
  • Flirt using playful innuendos and suggestive language. This builds sexual tension.
  • Make inviting suggestions for future plans. This gets them excited and involved.
  • Reassure them of your feelings and intentions. This provides comfort and security.

Using strategic language, you can make someone feel special, intrigued, connected, and attracted. Choose your words carefully but authentically.

W Rizz Someone Up Lines: The Most Effective Pick-Up Lines for Rizzing

Cheesy pick-up lines are icebreakers. If it bombs, you got a funny story. And if your wit and delivery hit the mark? You’ll have successfully rizzed up your target with charm and a pinch of laughter.

Here are some playful, charming, and W Rizz lines to pick and try:

  • Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw.
  • Are you a bank loan? Because you’ve got my interest.
  • Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.
  • Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future.
  • If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple.
  • Are you a camera? Because you make me smile every time I see you.
  • Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
  • Are you a Wi-Fi signal? Because I’m feeling a strong connection.
  • Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.
  • Are you a toaster? Because I’m looking for something to take a bath with tonight.
  • Is your dad a baker? Because you’re a cutie pie!
  • Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.
  • I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together.
  • Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
  • I’m learning about important dates in history, wanna be one of them?
  • Are you John Cena? Because I’ve never Cena girl like you before.
  • I think I saw you on Spotify, as the hottest single of the year.
  • Are you a library book? Because I can’t stop checking you out.
  • Hey, I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you, and I can’t seem to melt away.
  • Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.


As a relationship coach who’s been married for years, I’m thankful to be done with the dating scene. But rizzing is, at its core, a valuable skill for positive human connection. Learning this art can enrich all your relationships.

Just as I witnessed that suave stranger effortlessly rizz up the elegant woman at the bar, you too can unlock your potential to captivate and connect. With practice and courage, you’ll gain confidence and charisma.

Rizzing someone up is an ability that can be honed over time. Focus on authenticity, respect, humor, and engagement. See every interaction as a chance to spread positivity. Turn strangers into friends and friends into something more.

As you incorporate these tips into your interactions, pay attention to feedback. Adjust your approach based on reactions. Eventually, rizzing will feel natural, and you’ll emanate charm effortlessly.

Rizz the right one? Could lead to an epic night. Maybe even a partner for life. Take these tips and see where they take you. Try some pick-up lines, refine your flirting style, and employ thoughtful gestures. Master the art and dare to dazzle.

Now, please leave a comment sharing your thoughts on this article. What resonated with you? What else would you like to learn about rizzing? Let’s keep the conversation going!

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